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This story is dedicated to my ever faithful beta reader Katherine Robert
who asked specifically
for a story with this song in it for her birthday. Happy Birthday
Kath! I hope this lives up to your
expectations.
Teach Me
Inspired by Jann Arden's song "Insensitive"
by StormyNite Written in May of 1998
Timeline: 3rd season prior AtA
Part 1
Natalie knelt on the ground by the body. She watched the beautiful
blonde woman stand quietly
over to the side talking calmly with the uniformed officer. A
quick check of the corpse told her
the body had been moved to this location. The lack of blood around
the body from the ragged
wound in the woman's neck made it quite obvious. The blonde apparently
had found the body
and Nat really needed to speak with her. Nat nodded her head
at James Mitchell, the officer
taking the woman's statement, and he came quickly to Natalie's side.
"I need to speak with her,
Jim." She motioned toward the beautiful woman standing back away
from the body. "She is the
one that found her...correct?"
"Yes, Dr. Lambert! I'll bring her right over. She seems awfully
calm under the circumstances."
He eyed the pretty woman as she stood watching them closely, then he
smiled broadly as the
woman turned on the charm. James Mitchell responded immediately.
"Of course, I could
overlook anything SHE'D do as long as she turned those green eyes my
way." He puffed out his
chest to impress her, then walked away from Nat without a second thought.
"Men!" Nat shook her head in disgust. They all responded the same
to a pretty face and a body.
Nat had to admit the woman was beautiful and a perfect size 5 with
big boobs. Why did some
women have all the luck? Nat took a quick look at her own chest
and sighed in dismay. When
she looked up, the blonde was walking toward her. No doubt, no
hesitancy, no indecision
radiated from the woman as she stopped before Natalie who still knelt
on the ground by the
body, bagging the victim's hands.
"You wanted to see me, Dr. Lambert?" Miriam Coldwell's voice floated
around her like a cloud,
articulate as well as sensual. Nat eyed her closely. She'd
been wrong...size 6 not size 5. Not a
man present would be immune to her charm, but Nat wasn't a man.
"Yes, Miss Coldwell. I have a few questions for you myself."
Nat turned on the professional
facade, immune to the soft lilt in the other woman's voice when she
spoke. "Tell me if this is the
exact position you saw the body in when you first discovered it."
Nat pointed to the still form
lying on it's side with one leg twisted in an odd position almost behind
the torso.
Miriam looked at the body, then responded. "Well, now that you
mention it...no. She was
almost face down when I discovered her, and the leg wasn't twisted
back behind her like that
either." Shock registered on her face briefly, then she camouflaged
it behind a professional face
just as Nat had done earlier. She turned off the charm like a
switch. "You don't think she was
still alive, do you? I just assumed she was...I didn't touch
her to confirm it. I guess I should
have, but I had to use the cell phone in my car on the other side of
that building over there to
call the police. It couldn't have taken any longer than 5 minutes
for them to get here. I stood
over there by my car and waited in case they called back. My
phone is fastened in the car and
I left them my number. I'd feel really awful if she was still
alive and I didn't help her." Guilt
washed across the woman's face for a moment, then she tamped it down,
letting the professional
woman appear again.
Nat watched in fascination at how quickly the woman switched personas
in front of her, and her
curiosity got the better of her. "What is it you do, Miss Coldwell?"
Natalie eyed her closely and
waited.
"I'm an interpreter for the embassy." She nodded toward the building
behind Natalie. "I work
lots of long hours translating and interpreting German and Japanese
for the consulate." Miriam
smiled, then almost posed out of habit.
Nat watched and made a mental note in things to change in her own professional
presentation of
her job. The woman was proud of what she did, and it showed.
Natalie began to have a
grudging respect for the woman's quick mind and attitude in front of
adversity. At least the job
explained a great deal about how the woman handled trauma and the unusual.
She would deal
with it on an hourly basis in her job. She would either have
to learn to ignore it, or be eaten alive.
Apparently Miriam Coldwell thrived on it.
"No need to worry, Miss Coldwell. The woman has been dead several
hours." Natalie stood
and brushed off her slacks, noticing the dirt stains on the knees.
She turned to admire Miriam's
neat 2 piece suit with the short skirt and perfect legs extending into
2 inch heels. Obviously,
she'd either changed clothes earlier or she'd found the woman's perfect
suit material that didn't
wrinkle. With a twinge of jealousy rearing its ugly head, she
decided not to ask. She turned to
notice Nick and Tracy pull up in the caddy. Miriam watched Nat's
gaze and turned as Nick
stepped out of the car. Without thinking, Miriam adjusted her
suit, put on a smile and admired
the handsome man that approached.
"Who is he?" Miriam asked over her shoulder as Nick stopped to
get the preliminaries from
Mitchell, who stood 30 yards away from them.
"He's Detective Nick Knight...Metro Homicide. I'm sure he and
Tracy will have a few questions
for you, so don't run off." Natalie headed for Jacob who was
unloading the corpse cart from the
back of the coroner's wagon. Miriam walked toward Nick, Tracy,
and Mitchell. She caught
Mitchell's eye immediately and smiled. Nick and Tracy turned
to greet her.
Miriam extended her hand gracefully to Nick. "Miriam Coldwell,
Detective." Nick grasped her
hand gently and smiled. "Nick Knight..." Nick motioned
toward Tracy. "My partner, Tracy
Vetter. We have a few questions for you before we go downtown."
Nick eyed her closely.
The warm and sensual nature of the creature before him pulsed with
every beat of her heart, and
he responded immediately.
-------------
Nat stood beside Jacob as he finished bagging the body and watched Nick
out of the corner
of her eye. Each motion of Miriam's body was planned and accentuated.
To the casual eye,
however, it would look perfectly natural, and Nick responded to it
just like any other warm
blooded male would. If he had been worried about his progress,
Nat could certainly assure
him that he was acting perfectly human. One who was female oriented,
obviously ruled by his
libido, and totally sexually driven...and to be honest...it bothered
her. She finished watching
Jacob and signed off on the paperwork, all the time watching Nick ooze
his baby blues all over
Miriam. Somehow, she'd hoped he would have been indifferent to
Miriam, but apparently,
she'd read too much into their relationship again. Nick brushed
Miriam's arm and it was like a
physical blow to Natalie. He was coming on to her as well. <I
guess that should put me in my
place. Once again, Lambert, you've made a fool out of yourself.
Always the friend and nothing
more.> A tear started to form behind her eye and she forced it
back, refusing to humiliate
herself any further. She picked up her medical bag lying on the
ground, and started for her car.
Tracy, mumbling to herself, rounded the corner of the car just as Nat
opened the door. "Men!
They are all alike. They use their third leg instead of their
brain!" Tracy glared at Nick and
Miriam as they chatted on the other side of the clearing. Soft
lilting laughter could be heard
coming from Miriam as she posed and reposed in front of Nick for the
10th time. "I can't
believe Nick would fall for that. It makes me sick and you can't
get a sane word out of any
man here. Nick might as well just throw her in the back of the
caddy and have his way with her
right now and get it over with. Jeez...I thought..." Tracy
turned and saw Nat's face as Miriam
leaned over and whispered into Nick's ear and he smiled broadly.
Pain and something else
flashed across Nat's face, then she quickly stepped into the car.
"Nat...I'm sure it's nothing. You know men...Nick's just..."
Tracy regretted her remarks. Why
wasn't she using her head? Of all the things to point out and
say. Talk about brain dead...
sometimes she wondered about herself, but Nat cut her off.
"Yes, I know men...and I thought I knew Nick...I guess I was wrong."
Nat stared at Nick
briefly then pushed her emotions back where they belonged and became
the professional once
more. Unfortunately it wasn't fast enough to hide the pain that
washed through her, and Tracy
caught it. "In any case, Trace, it looks like it was a self inflicted
wound, but the body was moved
by someone more than once. I won't know for sure until I get
the body back to the morgue. I'll
be able to tell by the depth, cut pattern and serration of the wound."
Nat smiled forcefully and
looked at the young blonde before her, then slammed the door of the
car and started the engine.
Part 2
---------------
Tracy stared at her partner as he walked toward her. <Damn
him! Why do men have to be
so stupid?> Her blue eyes spit fire as Nick walked up and looked
around for Nat.
Confused by Tracy's hostility, Nick was at a loss. Maybe Nat could
fill him in. "So where's
Nat, Trace?" Nick decided to lighten his tone and tread easy.
Whatever Tracy's problem
was, it was directed at him. For the life of him, he couldn't
figure out what he'd done to tick
her off. He started to play back the evening in his photographic
memory and tried to make
sense of the anger he felt from his partner.
"She left, Nick!" Tracy almost growled in frustration. He
wasn't any different than all the rest
of them. That's what she got for thinking Nick was different.
"As if you really cared!"
"Trace, give me a clue here. The last I checked we were still
being civilized with each other....
and we are still partners. So why don't you take a deep breath..."
"Oh, right! Placate her because she's a female." Tracy walked
over and stood nose to nose
with Nick before she continued. "I wasn't the one thinking with
my third leg instead of my
head." She glanced angrily at Miriam who stood charming several of
the other officers. "You
could have just gotten her address and phone number discreetly, instead
of flaunting your
conquest in front of half the police force and hurting Nat like that."
Tracy backed off a bit and
slapped her notebook into his chest. "And don't think she didn't
notice you turning on that
blue-eyed, blond-haired charm of yours on our little tart over there.
If you wanted to have sex
with the bimbo, you could have at least been a little less obvious."
She turned to walk away, then had a second thought. "Oh, I forgot!
You and Nat are JUST
FRIENDS...at least...YOU are. Have a good night, partner.
I'm booking off because I'm
suddenly ill." Tracy stomped off toward a unmarked car refusing
to ride with Nick.
-----------
Natalie gowned up and started the autopsy on the young woman, trying
not to think as she
methodically went about her tasks. Try as hard as she could,
she couldn't stop the tears from
forming in her eyes and blurring her vision. It was a useless
fight. <Damn, Lambert! You are
such an idiot. What made you think Nick would notice the mind
over the body as he became
more human. He was a perfectly well adjusted heterosexual male
when he was human in the
13th century. Why did you expect him to react any differently
now? Men have chosen the
body over the brain for centuries.> A single tear slid down her
cheek silently followed by
another that she couldn't seem to stop no matter how hard she tried.
She'd guarded herself for so long, not getting involved because it always
ended the same.
She'd learned that when she was young. It was always the flirts,
the pretty girls, the tall model
types who got the good guys, not the ordinary girl with a brain.
They were classified as the
nerds, the girl you had as your bench partner to help you out...not
date. Why did she think
Nick was any different? They were friends. He'd said that
numerous times but somewhere
along the way it had changed for her. It wasn't Nick's fault,
it was hers. She'd let herself hope
he'd been trying to protect her after the fiasco at the Azure and let
herself in for this heartbreak.
He'd been telling the truth. You didn't survive 800 years with
LaCroix being stupid. Of course,
she wasn't suppose to remember any of it, but she had.
She'd played it over and over in her mind for days when her memory came
back. First she was
angry, then she analyzed what had happened and LaCroix's attitude toward
her. Nick was
protecting her just like he did everyone else but...he was using her,
and he'd done it well. Nick
had backed off since Valentines Day. She thought it was because
of all the events that had
transpired, but apparently not. <Well, Lambert, it's time to grow
up again. Maybe this time
you'll lose those romantic ideas that a knight in shining armor will
sweep you away and love you
just as you are.> Giving up, Natalie stepped back and tossed
the bloody scalpel into the sink
behind her. She could barely see, and it bothered her more than
she was willing to admit. Just
her luck someone would show up wanting a report and she'd be bawling
her eyes out, then
she'd have to explain.
Jill heard the noise and stuck her head through the door from the adjoining
room. "You okay,
Nat?" She sounded concerned as she spoke.
Nat turned her back to her quickly and striped her gloves. "I'm
fine, Jill. Just feeling a little
nauseous. Must be the flu or something and this isn't helping."
She nodded over her shoulder
at the body on the table, still not turning to her co-worker while
she fought to get the tears under
control.
"Maybe you should go home." Jill stated hopefully. Nat never
took care of herself. It was
always the job first...Nat second.
"I think you're right, Jill." Finally conquering her emotions
and tears, she turned to meet her
eyes across the room. "I'm going to call it a night and ask Jerry
to finish for me. I've done it
enough times for him. He owes me at least this one." Nat
sighed sadly, overwhelmed and
suddenly very tired.
"I'll finish the clean-up in here and call him. You just go on
home and I'll put our female guest
in the fridge until he gets here."
"Thanks, Jill." Nat had already turned and headed for the jacket on the back of her chair.
---------------
Nick parked the caddy and almost ran down the hall to the morgue.
Tracy had been right.
He was an insensitive idiot. It was just so pleasant to have
a beautiful woman find the man
attractive and not see the beast. He'd forgotten himself and
just gone with the feeling. Of
course, so had every other male present, but they weren't already involved
with someone else.
Nick stopped in mid-stride with that thought and smiled. He was
involved with Natalie
whether he admitted it or not. In fact, he loved her terribly
and if LaCroix hadn't made his usual
threats and innuendoes about hurting her or bringing her across, he
would have told her. He
should have told her anyway, but somehow he just couldn't say it out
loud, and if it kept her safe
from LaCroix, then he had to remain silent. Who was he kidding?
He'd kept silent not only out
of fear for Natalie, but fear she wouldn't feel the same. After
all, she'd seen him at his worst.
That was enough to scare any sane person off, why not Nat. He
didn't think he could stand
losing her friendship or her love if she did the logical thing and
run like Hell! So he'd laid back
since Valentines Day protecting what they had. Taking a deep
breath, he pushed open the
morgue door expecting to face an angry Natalie but found only Jill.
Jill just shut the fridge door when Nick stepped in. "Where's
Nat, Jill?" Nick listened for her
familiar heartbeat in vain, but heard nothing.
"She wasn't feeling well, Nick. So she went home." Jill
eyed Nick closely. If she was guessing
her illness had something to due with the blond detective before her.
Sometimes she just wanted
to smack them both upside the head for being so stupid. So she
decided to play a hunch.
"Seemed kind of weird, too. I've never seen Nat leave an autopsy
half finished. She seemed
more than ill. She was upset over something. She does a
great job of hiding her feelings, but
not tonight. You don't know anything about that? Do you,
Nick?" Jill eyed him closely and
watched the pain flash across his blue eyes before he tamped that famous
cold mask back in
place. Yes, there was more to Nick Knight than he let people
see....and part of it was Natalie.
She was right. "Maybe you should go check on her. I'm sure
she went straight home." Jill let
the suggestion hang in the air as she watched Nick cover his emotions
quickly, then smile.
"I'll do that, Jill. Thanks!" Nick turned and headed for
the door ignoring the snicker he heard
from Jill's lips when the door closed. Within moments of clearing
the back door, Nick took to
the air.
Part 3
-------------
Nat sighed as she pushed open the door and Sydney wrapped his warm fuzzy
body around her
legs. She bent to pick him up and caress him gently as she walked
into the kitchen and reached
for his bowl and the cat food in the cupboard.
"Well, Sydney, looks like I've done it again. I guess you are
just going to have to be my knight
in shining armor." Sydney purred loudly and cuddled up next to
Nat as she held him. His
warmth and genuine affection brought the tears back to her eyes as
she cuddled him closer.
"At least I know you love me." Grudgingly, she put him down on
the floor with his bowl, then
wiped the tears off her cheek. "You eat your supper while I take
a quick shower, then maybe
if you're lucky I'll let you lick my bowl when I'm done." She
patted the furry cat on the rump,
walked by the stereo, and flipped it on. It was the light rock
station that flooded the room when
she headed for the shower.
After she'd finished her shower, she stopped at the bureau drawer.
Finally deciding that the
only person who was ever going to see her new teal negligee was herself,
she tossed it over her
head, relishing the feel of the silky satin texture as it slid effortlessly
down her skin. Grabbing
the brush from the top of the bureau, she quickly attacked her glorious
mane of curls. When she
finished, she stared into the mirror and sighed as Sydney bounced up
onto the bed behind her.
"I guess Syd, that you're the only man who will ever appreciate this."
She leaned over and
picked him up and cuddled him closely. "At least you don't prefer
blondes." She was rewarded
with a load purr then a scratchy tongue as Sydney licked her cheek,
making her smile. Finally,
she grabbed her matching silk robe she'd purchased with the negligee
and headed for the kitchen.
She popped her dinner in the microwave, then poured a glass of red
wine and headed for the
couch. Sydney bounced right along beside her as she sipped the
red fluid, trying not to let her
mind drift back to Nick, but it didn't work.
"Well, Lambert it's your own childish fantasy that got you here. You'd
think you'd learn. It
always ended the same way. You are always good enough for a friend,
but nothing more.
You would think I'd be use to it by now, wouldn't you, Syd? I'm
always the smart one, the
one everyone needs help from and I give it. Just once, though,
I wish I would find someone
who could see that I have needs too. Why did I think it would
change this time...because Nick
wasn't human?" Nat turned to Sydney as he wrapped himself around
her legs while she adjusted
the stereo volume and base. "Well, he was sure human and all
male tonight. I should be thrilled
it was a human response from Nick, but it hurts too much. Of
course, he only called me his
friend. It's my fault for falling in love with him. Kinda
of funny in a way, Sydney. I always told
myself it wasn't going anywhere, but when I watched him with that girl
tonight, I knew that
everything we were doing was working, but I'd lost him. It's
always the pretty ones, the ones
with the big boobs and the small waist that catch their eye."
A tear began to form in her eye and
she pushed it back. "Well, at least this one wasn't stupid.
Of course, she didn't act it around
Nick. Ridiculous, but the girl turned the intellect off and the
sex on when Nick walked up. Too
bad I didn't learn to do that, then maybe I wouldn't be here at home
alone talking to you." She
leaned over and picked up Sydney and headed for the couch. "It's
time to get a reality check,
Syd. Time to go back where I belong."
She sat down and tucked her feet underneath her, the soft melodious
tones of Jann Arden
poured through the speaker as she leaned back into the soft cushions
of the couch, letting them
cradle her with the warmth of a lovers arms that would never be.
How do you cool your lips
After a summer's kiss
How do you rid the sweat
After the body bliss
How do you turn your eyes
>From the romantic glare
How do you block....the sound of a voice
You'd know anywhere
Oh I really should have known
By the time you drove me home
By the vagueness in your eyes
Your casual good-byes
By the chill in your embrace
The expression on your face
That told me you might have some advice to give
On how to be insensitive
She should turn it off, she knew she should, but something about the
song compelled her to
let it play. She shouldn't go here...It wouldn't help...It would
only make her feel worse and the
song played on.
How do you numb your skin
After the warmest touch
How do you slow your blood
After the body rush
How do you find your soul
After you've found a friend
How do you teach your heart...it's a crime
To fall in love again
Tears began to fall silently down her cheeks. She sat the glass
of wine on the corner table,
stared at the blood red color and gave into the pain she felt in her
heart and soul...and the final
verse echoed through the room.
Oh, you probably won't remember me
It's probably ancient history
I'm one of the chosen few
Who went ahead and fell for you
I'm out of vogue, I'm out of touch
I fell too fast, I fell too much
I thought that you might have some advice to give
On how to be...insensitive
"Teach me to be insensitive, Nick. Teach me not to love you, to
let you go and be the man
you were meant to be. Teach me how to stop the pain, to go on
with my mortal life without
you. Teach me how to stop feeling so alone when you're not here,
how to put on the cold mask
of indifference and walk away like I don't care...Teach me, Nick...teach
me..." The words
sobbed from her lips and she gave into the grief and pain of loss while
the tears poured from
her eyes.
----------------
Nick stood outside the door listening to the words of the song and her
sob. He never meant to
hurt her. He loved her, couldn't she see that? It was so
easy to flirt with the blonde. It made
him feel sexy, wanted, desired, but he didn't love her. He could
never love her...She wasn't
Natalie. It just made him feel human and in doing so, he'd hurt
the one person he'd sworn
never to harm. The one person who'd given him hope and love unconditionally.
The one
person who made him whole after all these centuries. He was such
an idiot. The music echoed
through his mind as her sobs tore at what was left of his soul.
He should leave her to move on,
to let her start over with someone who could love her as she deserved...but
her pain was his.
The words she spoke ripped him apart until he couldn't take it anymore.
Part 4----ADULT
She sobbed into her hands as the tears continued to flow unchecked.
"Teach me, Nick...not to
care. Teach me to be cold...insensitive." He appeared
before her through her tear-filled, blurry
eyes. "Just go away, Nick. I can only have you in my dreams,
and that's not enough anymore.
I'm tired of being the strong one...The one who's just the friend...The
one who is foolish enough
to conjure you up like a schoolgirl dream and pretend, just once, that
we aren't...just friends."
She stared at him like he wasn't there but only in her mind, and the
tears continued to rack her
small body. "Go away, Nick. I'm a big girl now, and the
dream isn't enough anymore...I have
to go back to reality, to what I truly am. What I've always been
to you....a friend." Pain tore
at her soul because what she needed and wanted could never be hers
and somehow she had to
come to terms with it. "Just teach me to be insensitive to how
I feel, then you can finally
disappear and I won't conjure you up anymore. I won't fantasize
there can be something more."
She dropped her head into her hands, then curled into a ball and wept.
Nick's heart broke when he listened to her words realizing she thought
he was only a dream.
Her pain washed over him until it took his breath away. She dreamed
of him just as he did her.
They'd been fools to let this go this far without talking about it.
He'd pushed her away to protect
her because he loved her, only it hurt her instead. It had hurt
them both.
"Natalie..." Nick sat down on the couch and pulled her small form
into his lap and cradled her
there. Out of pure need to take the pain away he caressed her
back and pulled her hair away
from her face. Softly he kissed her forehead, then her eyes and
finally her soft lips. The warmth
and feeling of love he'd always felt from her was laced with so much
pain, so much torment...and
it was all his fault. "Natalie, oh please...Nat. Let me
take the pain away...let me love you." He
kissed her harder now with the need to make them whole. She opened
her mouth and gave into
him. The sweet taste of her mouth, the salt on her lips cried
out with a need that only he could
fulfill, and he craved it. He wanted to give her what she needed.
His cool lips caressed hers and she gave into the dream. He kissed
her passionately and begged
for forgiveness. She wanted the dream to go on forever.
When he scooped her up and headed
for the bedroom, she prayed she would never wake up.
He laid her down on the soft comforter and stretched out on top of her.
He let his hands caress
her and cherish every inch of her body in the silky negligee.
The feel of her warmth through the
coolness of the silk made him ache to feel her bare skin beneath him
and his lips found hers once
more. She felt so hot under his fingertips and the desire of
the man overtook the needs of the
vampire.
Nat gave into the fantasy and ran her hands over his hard body, letting
each finger caress and love
every inch of the man on top of her. Slowly, she slipped her
tongue inside his mouth and her
hands inside his shirt. The hard planes of his chest and the
fine soft hair made her groan with
desire. She wanted more and if you were going to fantasize, why
not go all the way? Do
everything she'd ever dreamed of doing and more. It was her dream
and she should enjoy it.
She ripped his shirt open then ran her hands over the flat of his stomach
and sucked hard on his
bottom lip only to return and plunder the sweet recesses of his mouth
once more. He groaned
in pleasure as her hands found his hard cock and kneaded him softly
through his tight jeans.
Each stroke brought a gasp from his lips, and he grew larger in her
hands as he pushed into them.
Her mouth kissed down his neck and nuzzled him at the base of his throat
and he groaned again
with a different need. Without thinking she pushed him over onto
his back and followed with her
body on top of his. She reached up and stripped the negligee
and robe off, then straddled him.
"Nat..." Nick reached up to her unable to take his eyes off her.
She was so beautiful, and the
heat that radiated from her as well as her siren heartbeat, beckoned
the vampire within. Her skin
was so soft and her breasts perfect. He watched in fascination
as he teased her nipples until they
hardened under his touch. He needed to taste her, to put his
mouth where his hands were, to
worship her breasts until they begged for release. He pulled
her toward him. He lifted himself up
and kissed her swollen lips, then licked his way down her neck to her
breasts until the soft sweet
nubs he'd excited earlier with his hands were now his to taste.
He suckled her breast until she
whimpered and pulled his head hard against her breast demanding more
for the other soft mound
that was left unattended.
The feeling of his lips on her breasts was not enough. She wanted
more. She wanted the dream
to never end. Without hesitation, she tore his shirt off him,
then pushed him back flat on the bed
once more. He growled in protest until she pressed her soft smooth
skin next to his and slowly
lifted her upper torso across his chest. His own nipples responded,
and she licked and sucked
them into her hot, wet mouth making him gasp. His hands caressed
her sides, then her ass. She
sucked and twirled the hard buds of his nipples in the wet recesses
of her mouth, while she
rubbed her naked thighs and soft mound on his growing manhood, restrained
under his tight jeans.
She finally released his hard buds, as her hands worked on the zipper
to his jeans and slowly
tasted every inch of his neck driving him insane.
"Natalie...tell me you know what you're doing...tell me..." Nick gasped
between breaths as her
lips captured his in total possession and her hands pushed his jeans
over his hips. Desire raged
within Nick and the feel of her hot, naked body on his cool skin was
rapidly making him lose
control. Her hands wrapped around his shaft and he screamed in
pleasure as she stroked him
to his full length. With great effort he pulled his lips from
hers. "Nat, you have to stop this...we
have to stop..."
"NO!" She growled into his ear. This time I'm in control
and you are mine. I am going to make
you want me so bad that you will never want another woman. I'm
going to make you beg me to
release you, then I'm going to let you feel everything that I am, everything
that I want. Just as I
have always dreamed." She stood quickly, then pulled his jeans
free from his hips.
She stood at the foot of the bed and admired his perfect form and his
erection, now throbbing in
need. She knelt on the bed and slowly kissed his inner thigh,
letting her fingertips lightly caress
his groin, yet not touching his hard staff. She let her breast
just barely touch the skin of his calves
and sensually let her tongue follow the same motion on his thigh as
her breasts moved over his
calf. Alternating between soft and hard pressure with her breast
and tongue she wove a path to
his manhood, never once letting her fingertips touch his pulsing shaft.
He bucked in frustration as
the warmth and heat from her lips and tongue fueled the fires of desire
deep within him. A low
growl emanated from his chest as he became frantic in need and grabbed
her hand. Too quick
for him, she pulled free and raked a sharp nail down his groin to his
inner thigh, causing it to
bleed. The exquisite pain of pure carnal lust shot through him
as her lips sealed the scratch with
her tongue and she sucked his blood into her mouth.
"Natalie........No!!!!!!!" He sat up quickly only too late to
stop her from ingesting his blood.
Ripples of pure pleasure ripped through him and the blue of his eyes
now glowed amber with
the bloodlust of the vampire, but she ignored it. "What have
you done, Nat?" Nick threw back
his head in pleasure as he supported himself with his arms while her
lips sucked every tiny drop
of the blood from the scratch on his groin. She worked closer
and closer to his shaft, then let her
finger softly trace his shaft to the tip. Nick lurched and grabbed
her arms to stop the torture her
mouth and fingers were creating. She smiled wickedly when her
blue eyes met his gold ones.
"Enough, Nat...enough!" He pulled her lips back to his.
Her hand worked free and grabbed his
hard shaft and pumped hard as his tongue dueled with hers. The
groan from his lips brought a
satisfied smile as she kneaded and massaged his full length.
He released her arms to run his
fingers through the auburn mane of fire that he had dreamed of so many
times before. She
continued to caress the entire length of him, making him harder and
longer than he ever known
possible.
She broke free from his lips and watched the blatant desire burn brightly
in his golden eyes as
she squeezed his balls gently while he massaged his fingers through
her hair. Nick's fangs had
dropped and they fascinated her. Ever so carefully she brought
her lips back to his and let her
tongue trace each one to it's full length. He gasped and she
smiled. "I wonder which is more
sensitive to my touch?" She pulled hard on his shaft and licked
one of his fangs until he groaned
in anticipation and sought to pierce her lip with his fang. She pulled
back quickly and bent over,
taking his hard shaft deep within her hot, wet mouth.
Unprepared for the sensation, Nick fell back on his elbows as the warmth
washed through him
in waves of pleasure and he screamed her name. He pushed into
her mouth and she sucked hard,
alternating with the soft slick feeling of her tongue wrapped around
his shaft caressing it all the
way down until she deep throated him. He felt himself lost in
a wave of pleasure as she pulled
blood semen to the tip of his penis, then licked it off. Nick
watched in amazement as her head
worked over his shaft giving him such pleasure and drinking in everything
his body had to offer
her. Wave after wave of pleasure ripped through him until he
thought he'd gone mad with need.
"Nat!!!!! Please...I'm begging you...help me..." He said
between gasps.
She rose from his groin, then slowly licked the bloody fluid around
the corners of her mouth as
he watched, fascinated. "No, Nick. I'm not finished with
you...not yet." She pushed him back
down on the bed as he tried to pull her lips back to his. Effortlessly
she straddled his hard shaft
and sat down, letting it's hard tip rub her mound and clit on the way
down. She grabbed the
shaft with soft fingers and ground it hard against her as she rose
slowly, then seated herself once
more. She played with the head of his shaft and ground it hard
into her clit pulling her labia
around his shaft but refusing him full entry.
He writhed in frustration and the vampire surged forth. "Nat...anything...please!"
He reached
for her breasts and pulled her forward till his lips found the tight
buds they sought. He sucked
them first hard, then gently, until his fangs sliced the delicate tissue
and blood flowed freely from
the cut. Her scent filled the room and his lips latched onto
her bleeding breast and sucked all
that she was into him with no regrets as he sheathed himself deep within
her.
A cry of pleasure tore from her lips as he buried himself within her.
She rocked forward onto
his shaft as he licked the wound over her breast until it healed.
Fulfillment and love washed over
her as he suckled at her breast, taking her all into him at once.
She wanted more...needed more
as she ground her pelvis onto his.
Feeling the desire in her blood and sensing her needs, he quickly flipped
her over and pulled his
shaft almost out, rubbing her clit on the way causing her to gasp,
then whimper. Quickly he
thrust back within her burying himself deeper and deeper with each
stroke, making her scream
his name this time. Each thrust caused such exquisite pain in
both of them, that time stood still
as they balanced on the precipice of an eternity of denial and frustration.
As he pounded himself deep within her, he leaned over and cradled her
head in his hands and
watched her eyes fill with love and desire for him. "Come with
me, Natalie. Be one with me.
Let me show you how much I love you." He gasped as her body began
to contract around his
hard shaft, and she gave into her own orgasm. Unable to stop
the inevitable, he pushed deep
within her and pumped harder. Sensing his need, she watched him
fight his own beast. "I love
you, Nick. Make us one!" She pulled his mouth to her neck
without a second thought. His
body exploded within her as he planted his fangs deep within her neck.
Love flooded his senses
and a warmth he'd never known engulfed his cold heart.
He drank deeply until the pleasure
they each felt became one and the beast was satisfied.
Afraid he'd taken too much, he pulled free from her neck only to have
her pull him back. A soft
whimper greeted his ears as he tried to pull away. He nuzzled
and licked her neck until she got
control of all the new sensations flooding her system, then relaxed.
Once the first rush of
pleasure subsided, Nick gave into the feeling of Natalie within him.
His betrayal and the pain
she'd felt when he'd come on to Miriam tore at his heart. The
feelings of love and hope were
interlaced between everything he felt from her, based on a faith in
him that he found hard to
explain, and then...doubt. Doubt that what she was feeling, what
had happened between them
was anything but a dream on her part, and she would eventually wake
up and be alone. A wave
of fear and desolation touched him and he gasped at the enormity of
how alone she'd felt in what
they'd been doing. How she felt that her feelings for him were
so one sided, and that everything
he'd said at the Azure on Valentine's Day had been true.
Part 5-ADULT
"Nat?" Nick gently touched her face and pulled her hair out of
her face. Tears ran down her
face and her eyes remained closed tight. "Nat...open your eyes...please?
I'm here. I'm really
here." He grabbed her hand and rubbed it down his face in an
effort to force her to believe
what she felt.
"No, Nick. I'll open my eyes and you'll be gone. It will all be a dream and I'll have to live with..."
"Nat!" He refused to let go of her hand and nipped her with his
fangs to make her open her eyes.
"Look at me. Touch me. I'm real...you're real. What
we just did is real...and I love you!" He
kissed the palm of her hand as her eyes slowly opened. "I was
stupid tonight. I didn't think. It
just felt so good to do something normal and not have the beast rear
its ugly head. I never meant
it to hurt you, only love you. Only that could get you killed,
and we both know it. If LaCroix or
the enforcers don't kill you, I could."
He hung his head in regret, then took a deep breath. "I should
have left a long time ago, let you
get on with your life and make you forget, but I'm not strong enough.
You're the reason I've
learned to feel again, to be more human, and I guess that means...I
have used you." He looked
at her to see if she understood and saw pain. That's not what
he wanted her to feel and it tore
at him body and soul.
She stood and tried to pull away, but he stopped her. "Look at me, Nat! Listen to me!"
"No, Nick. Let me go. I understand...I understand everything now."
She pulled harder, but he
refused to let her go. "Nick, please this is humiliating enough.
Don't make it worse. I know
you just love my strength and humanity, but you have yours back now,
or at least you will have
in a few years. You don't have to stay around me anymore.
There will be lots of beautiful
woman to keep you company, and they won't even notice the vampire.
You don't need me
anymore. You don't need the dowdy little nerd to keep your libido
in check anymore." Tears
poured down her cheeks as she stood naked before him and straightened
her shoulders with
pride. She glared first at the hand on her wrist, then into his
blue eyes.
Pulling her forcefully back into his arms, he wrapped his arms around
her protectively, then held
her warmth next to him until she stopped struggling. "I will
always need you, Nat, because I love
you. It's not the safest thing for you...but I love the whole
package just as it is. And the package
doesn't have to be a size 6 and blonde to attract me. You are
the most beautiful woman I've ever
known in 800 years, because you're pretty both inside and out...and
you love me...Nicholas de
Brabant and the vampire. You're not frightened or influenced
by the vampire's charisma or the
man's blue eyes. You want all of me, not just part. No
one has ever wanted that before. No
one has ever trusted me enough to control the vampire or accepted me
with all those little
problems included. You make me whole and I can't live without
you. I don't want to live
without you." He'd finally put into words what he'd felt since
the day he awoke on that morgue
table and she hadn't run away.
When he released her arms and she didn't move, he gently traced her
lips with his fingertips
letting everything he felt show in his eyes. The facade of Nick
Knight was gone and the man
stood before her naked in both body and soul. "Let me show you
how much I love you, how
much I want you. Then if you want me to leave, I will."
Slowly he brought his lips to hers and
kissed her softly. She stood motionless and hesitated as his
lips moved down her neck. His lips
felt so good, and she wanted to believe him. She wanted to let
herself believe that this wasn't a
dream, and Nick truly did care. Her mind fought for control,
but her body responded
immediately.
Sensing her acceptance and need, he pulled her back into bed.
This time, he was in control.
This time she belonged to him and a part of her reveled in it.
Each touch was one of desire and
something else. Each kiss held passion and love, and he lost
himself in the scent of what was
only Natalie. He rolled her nipples between his fingertips until
they hardened, then finally
replaced the soft feathery touch of his fingers with his lips.
He sucked gently at first and she
was lost. She ran her hands over his shoulder into his silky
blond hair and encouraged his efforts.
Each stroke of his tongue enflamed her, each touch of his fingers made
her want more. He
stopped teasing her breast and moved downward until she writhed in
anticipation and desire.
He separated her labia with his fingers and wet her with her own juices.
Her scent enveloped
him and he gasped in anticipation. He wanted to taste all that
she was, all that was Natalie as
she gave herself into passion and love. She'd let him glimpse
it before, and he wanted it again.
He would die without it and his heart knew it. He kissed her
soft mound and let his tongue taste
the sweet nectar that beckoned to him even stronger than her blood.
He found her clit and
sucked gently until she moaned in the agony of denial, then she pushed
his head harder into her
core. He lapped at the juices she let flow freely and his tongue
plunged deep within her wet
core, but it wasn't enough for either of them. Quickly he nicked
her clit with his fang and sucked
gently. A rush of hot desire filled with pleasure coursed through
them both and she screamed his
name in frustration.
"Nick...come to me...please...I can't take it any more. I need
you inside of me. I need all of
you..." Natalie writhed beneath him as he nicked her again and
sucked harder driving her insane
with need along with himself.
He released her and dragged his hard, cool, naked body along hers as
she had done to him
earlier. He rested above her, hot with desire, and a need only
she could fulfill...but he had to
know. With his lips only inches from hers, and his hard shaft
pressed hard against her clit he
asked. "Do you believe I love you, Natalie?" He thrust
with his hips but pulled back when she
pushed onto him. "Tell me you love me...all of me...vampire and
man." His lips came closer as
his whispered the question he feared the most. "Tell me you won't
send me away. That you'll
stay with me forever." He waited, filled with hope that this
beautiful creature truly loved him
body and soul.
She could feel the tension within him and the need for her honesty.
He knew what was in her
blood. The vampire knew the answers, but the man needed the words.
She traced her tongue
across his lips that were so close, then she lifted slightly to kiss
him solidly. Her tongue plunged
into his mouth and he gave into their needs and sheathed himself within
her. He broke the kiss
and stared into her blue eyes filled with love, and she spoke
the words he needed to hear.
"Love me, Nick, as I love you...now and forever." She reclaimed
his lips as her body responded
to his.
He plunged deep within her and they both gave into the emotions kept
at bay for so many years.
Each stroke made him need another and the friction brought such pleasure
he thought he would
die. Her body craved his, but did her mind? The man couldn't
deny the woman of his heart no
matter what happened tomorrow. Tonight they were one as they
should have been so long ago.
They rode the waves of pleasure with each stroke, each giving and taking
from the other until her
body demanded release and gave into the love and the man who held her
heart and soul. "Make
me one with you, Nick. Come with me." Her body screamed
out in release as her body
contracted around his shaft driving him over the precipice along with
her. He plunged deep
within her, crying out her name with his release and exploded deep
within her hot core. A feeling
of warmth and love he'd long forgotten poured from his loins
into her, and exhaustion overcame
him along with a feeling of incredible peace. He rolled over
and pulled her with him. She gave
into the contentment and love that overshadowed everything else in
her life.
No sooner had he ensconced her in his embrace, he felt the starving
beast surge forth. Terror
gripped his heart as he fought for control of the creature who craved
the blood of the one thing
he loved more than life. He stiffened and waged war with himself.
"It's alright, Nick." She pulled his lips to her neck. "Teach
me to be a part of you, to understand
all that you are, to let us truly become one. Let the vampire
love me too, Nick, and I'll teach you
both how to love for eternity." Her blue eyes met golden ones
and he kissed her softly, then he
brushed the hair from her face and neck with such gentleness that bespoke
the love in his heart.
"Forever, Nat...I will hold you to that." His fangs gently pierced
her skin and they became one
once more.
The End
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